You are Loved

Little Girl,
You are loved.

I remember driving in my car, talking to you, talking as if I had already birthed you. I would look back over my shoulder, to the back seat behind the front passenger seat, and talk to you as if you were there. And just to be clear: all of the conversations I had with you were inspired by faith. At that point, I had not even met your daddy and I had never before been pregnant. But as I drove my car back in those days and felt the hope that only God can give of Greater Things to Come, I spoke to you as if you were there, knowing in my heart--despite what I saw with my own eyes--that one day you would be.

I'm sure that most people would have thought I had lost my mind--and I have a couple of things to say about that: (1) It doesn't matter what "most people" say. It's only WHAT GOD SAYS that matters. He gave me a HOPE that I believed so firmly in that I could actually VISUALIZE the fruition of it. So I spoke to you then, imagining what it would be like to have you, to have my hopes and prayers answered in the presence of you. (2) PEOPLE didn't save my soul. They are not the source of my self-esteem or hope. It's God. I'm telling you: I hope it doesn't take you as long as it did me to figure out that AS A CHILD OF THE MOST HIGH GOD, we will not walk, talk, stand, or live like everyone else--and that's not a bad thing. You will stand out, Psalm, because you are His child. You will be blessed coming and going; you will find SUPERNATURAL FAVOR on this earth because of Him. Welcome it, darling.

Fitting in really is over-rated, anyway.

One day, you will realize that your Mommy is not "the norm" by anyone's standards. And although I spent the first two and a half decades of my life struggling to figure out why I didn't fit in, why I couldn't seem to be "normal." I have finally realized that GOD MADE ME JUST THE WAY I AM FOR A PURPOSE.

And I'm here to tell you that He made YOU just the way you are for a purpose!

For Psalm, An Introduction

It has been on my mind to do something like this for a long time--perhaps even from my pregnancy with her. But this is it. Finally a blog named for her, for my little girl, Psalm.

I hope, in this blog, to post only those things which can help her, may help her, will help her as she grows and matures into the beautiful young woman of God that she is destined to become.

As I embark on this new blog today, I can hear her voice in the other room, talking to her father about her most recent viewing of Toy Story 3.

She is three.

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I hope, Psalmie, that you never have to read this blog to hear my voice, that you can call me any time you have a question or need an answer of some kind. I pray that God will allow me to be here for you as long as I possibly can. But no matter what, I wanted to, needed to, chronicle some things that I think may help you as you grow older, look ahead, look back...

No matter what you read or think of all of the postings on this blog named in your honor, I hope that you will never forget HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU and HOW DEEPLY. You are a source of GREAT JOY for me--you are my miracle, my answer to countless prayers, the product of the love I share with your father.

You are loved deeply and always, little girl. Mommy loves you forever.